Dearest friends, admires, and promoters,
Its with a heavy heart that I sit down to write you all this letter. As many of you know, earlier this week I canceled a tour that I was due to start today, and one that I had been looking forward to for sometime. On top of that, I had to pull out of my tour early this last spring and two years ago was forced to cancel a tour that was booked for Europe and Australia. Each one of these decisions came with an incredible weight, and much shame.
I’ve always taken pride in my ability to push through for weeks and months on end, with a recourse that I may only see. Although with everything, you can only push it down for so long before for it starts rear its ugly head. As I look back over the years, I see that my body has been giving me some warning signs for some time. Over the past few years, I have been trying to work on self care, but it alway manages to find itself secondary to music and work. I haven’t been able to “push through” in a way that I once could and now find it effecting my ability to be present in the way that you, the audience, and me as the performer deserve.
I found myself at home with what seemed to resemble a tangled ball of twine. Some days I would get a knot to loosen, only to find that it had pulled those around it taught. The quicker I tried to make my way through, the more mangled it became. It became overwhelmingly clear (beyond trying to convince myself otherwise) that I couldn’t handle any more knots. What I needed was the time to slowly untangle them, however long that takes.
To all of you who have supported me by purchasing tickets, promoting and putting on shows, buying albums, I see you and I am so sorry. I know that a lot of planning goes into these events, and a cancellation can bring not only disappointment but can impact your time and finances. I don’t take that lightly and I hope one day I can truly make it up to you.
I have a great love for music and for creating. It is as much life giving as the blood in my veins and the breath in my lungs. That all being said, I want and desire to be present and healthy in it. I look forward to being in a better place again, performing my songs, sharing in your stories, and meeting you after the shows.
Thank you all for your continued support and love. I never take it for granted.